My Head is Full of Stuffing
by FrankandJoe3
Summary: Dick gets picked to play the Scarecrow in the school's play of the Wizard of Oz.


**So… I saw Kameron play the Scarecrow again. He's still as freakin' adorable as last time, but this time, he slapped me and told me to quit calling him adorable, so now I'm in a bad mood… But seeing Kameron as the Scarecrow and remembering The Wiz (the black Wizard of Oz basically) made me decide Robin would be a cute Scarecrow… **

Dick groaned, squirming in his scratchy costume. Nothing about it felt right. The pants were too baggy and he couldn't move as loosely as he needed; his shirt was made of scratchy material and every time he moved, his arms would become irritated; the make-up on his face was heavy and it felt weird to move any of his face muscles; the stupid straw hat he had to wear kept scratching his forehead; the straw around his wrists and inkles made him fidget uncomfortably. He hated having to be the Scarecrow. Why couldn't he have been the Tin Man? It'd be so easy to paint himself silver and carry a sharp looking plastic axe instead of having to parade around in such a stupid get-up.

It was worth it though. Earlier, he had sadly brought up the play, cradling his head in his hands at the table to Alfred. Alfred had gotten that happy look in his eyes, that one look he had on Christmas morning when Dick grabbed the colorful box in his hands because Alfred just _knew _that Dick would love it. Apparently, Bruce's favorite movie of all time was the Wizard of Oz, so Alfred had called Bruce at work and told him. Now, Dick had to shake off butterflies as he waited for his mentor to finally come to his school for the first time in four years to watch something he had put time and effort into making perfect.

Nervously, Dick picked out from behind the curtain, looking over the crowd. Cameras were already flashing like mad so it was hard to see, but he could identify a few people in the crowd. He saw the families of his friends mostly, recognizing parents and guardians and little siblings. It was all just a bunch of people he didn't know. He couldn't find Bruce or Alfred anywhere. He kept his mind hopeful though and kept looking. He never did spot them, but he did spot someone that made his stomach clench uncomfortably: Wally. Almost instantly, he hid back behind the curtain, slipping his phone up from out of his boot. He dialed the all too familiar number, removing his hat and holding it in his free hand, peeking out from behind the curtain again.

"Hello?" Wally's voice came distorted out on the other end of the line.

"Dude," Dick hissed, trying not to sound mad, "Why the hell are you at Gotham Academy?"

There was a moment of silence and Dick heard Wally hit someone, grumbling at them to shut up before a high pitched and whiny sob came muffled into the background.

"Sorry Rob, what?" Wally was torn between an apology and annoyance.

Dick set a finger to his ear, blocking out the sounds of the giggly lollipop kids.

"Why are you at my school?" he asked louder, watching Wally discretely, now holding his hat between his knees.

The ginger stood up and looked around, as if looking to see him. 

"My little cousin Gracie is playing Dorothy in the play. Where are you?" curious emerald eyes lingered over the stage.

Dick slipped back inside the curtain, not wanting to be seen.

"I'm playing the Scarecrow," he admitted, embarrassed.

Wally's loud and obnoxious laugh filled his mind and he couldn't help but grin. He hated that laugh, but he loved it at the same time. It was beautiful in its own way. When Dick didn't say 'just kidding', the laughter suddenly halted.

"No way… you're serious?"

Dick grumbled under his breath, sighing hard and slipping the hat back on. It was hurting his knees.

"Shut up man," he whined at the laughter that started up again, "And I don't see any little cousin of yours anywhere. The girl who plays Dorothy is _huge_."

The laughter turned into hysterical gaspy giggles.

"Yo Grayson, two minutes 'til. Phones off," Coach Johnson snapped at Dick, slapping the base of his head, causing him to trip forward and faceplant near the edge of the curtain, letting out a cry of pain, his phone sliding away from his grasp.

He heard Wally's laughter grow even louder at his fall, the sound drifting through the air like axe or perfume through the locker-room. Dick groaned under his breath, scrambling forward and snatching up his phone and walking back behind the curtain.

"See you after the show," Dick said into his phone, grumbling sourly under his breath.

"Heh- yeah! Heh, heh… b-break a leg!" Wally giggled evenly before Dick hung up, slipping his phone into his boot.

He rubbed the back of his head painfully, adjusting his hat. At least Bruce would be here to see him. That part was nice. Dick grinned to himself, dashing back to join Thom who had been suckered into being the Lion. Part of him was excited to be here, but the other part just wanted to go home and sleep so Wally wouldn't tease him tomorrow.

XxXxX

Dick's heart was racing. His big number was coming up. He wasn't worried though. He had this mastered.

"Do? Why… If I had a brain, I could…" he let his voice trail until the spotlight trained solely on him.

He stayed on the ground, seeing that he couldn't move, pretending to give a say about what 'Dorothy' had to say. She wasn't very pretty at all, and she wasn't even a brunette. She was a ginger, and an ugly one at that. She had a pretty voice though. He blinked his eyes and put on his most enthusiastic face.

"I could wile away the hours, conferring with the flowers, consulting with the rain," he made himself as animated as he could, bobbing and swaying to tune of the piano, trying to seem as enthusiastic as a crippled scarecrow could for the moment.

He leaned back, lifting his legs curiously and pushing back his hat. The last part was just because his forehead was starting to sweat, but the crowd didn't need to know that.

"And my head I'd be scratching while my thoughts were busy hatching, if I only had a brain…" his voice was strong and resilient across the silent gym, proving that he didn't need the mic.

He got to his knees and rolled away from Dorothy, rather happy about doing so. Then he got to his knees, attempting to stand. The wannabe Dorothy ran after him, offering him a hand as he wobbly tried to stand to his feet, his legs shaking as he did so.

"I'd unravel every riddle for any individual," he tilted his head to look up at Dorothy, a hand on his knee to help himself up, but he focused on the lights behind her instead of her face, "In trouble or in pain…"

Dorothy awkwardly held him by the collar, trying to support him the best she could without actually supporting him. He trembled the best he could make himself before he made himself collapse. He tilted so Dorothy couldn't catch him and he hit the ground softly. Dorothy had to kneel down and grab him by the front of his shirt, pulling him up a little.

"With the thoughts you'll be thinking, you could be another Lincoln, if you only had a brain," Dorothy sang, her whiny voice just perfect for the roll of Dorothy.

She stared lovingly down at Dick. He awkwardly averted his eyes, forcing himself to stay animated and in character. He instead tried to stand to his feet again, tilting to the left cautiously.

"Oh I… would tell you why," Dick made himself jump to-and-fro, his direction influenced by Dorothy's tugs, reminding himself of a kangaroo or a Jack in the Box.

He shook her hand off, standing strong for a moment.

"The ocean is near the shore…" he spun around bravely, finishing the last string of lyrics.

He was stronger now, definitely in control of his limbs now. He pointed every other second to Dorothy, hiding his disgust.

"I could think of things I'd never thunk before," Dick hid his uncomfortableness at the non-real word, but he kept with it. "And then I'd sit… and think some more."

He twirled down and fell to his knees, setting a hand to his hat for emphasis. He slowly climbed back to his feet.

"I would not be just a nothing," he twirled playfully, "my head all full of stuffing… my heart all full of pain…"

He made a heart with his gloved hands and put it over his chest, frowning dramatically. Then he blushed madly, screwing up his eyes as he forced his body to wiggle, flinging his arms and legs about like a rag doll, wincing at his own stupid dancing. He could see Dorothy hiding her laughter by turning her head.

"I would dance and be merry, life would be a ding-a-derry, if I only had a brain!" now, he was basically just trying to kick his feet as high as his head, trying to hit them with his hand.

Stupid as it looked, it was working. The crowd was eating it up, giggling as he pranced about on the large stage. Then he forced himself into a twirl so hard that he purposely slipped and fell, letting out a dramatic and purposeful cry of surprise as he hit the ground surprisingly hard. Dorothy and her real puppy that was supposed to be Toto rushed to his side, helping him to stuff some of the straw back into his costume.

"Wonderful!" Dorothy cried, "If our scarecrow back in Kansas could do that, the crows would be scared to pieces!"

Dick had been scanning the crowd, not really paying attention to what she said. She had to nudge him for his line.

"W- Oh… They would?" he was already off a little, so it didn't matter.

"Yes," Dorothy nodded.

Dick's eyes darted back to the crowd, but he kept his face trained on Dorothy. He could see Wally laughing behind his pale hands in the stands.

"Where's Kansas?" he was loud enough and it was just perfect.

Then he saw him. In the crowd, a few rows above Wally, sat Bruce and Alfred, both in rather good moods. They were obviously amused. His false animated act suddenly became real. He felt as if his head was really made of stuffing, and it was the good kind too.

**Dudes… Kameron was such a cute little scarecrow… I bet Dick was cuter though. And as for Gracie… the Dorothy in our play was freakin' beautiful with a gorgeous voice, so I just figured a cousin of Wally's would have to be definitely different… (: Review?**

**-F.J. **


End file.
